"The Hit."

It's sunday night and I'm absolutely exhausted! 

By 11am on saturday my house had become over run with many a film person and so much equipment that it was being put on the balcony. There just was no room for 15 crew members, lighting equipment, cameras, lenses, my hamster and all the rest of my belongings.

My flat was the perfect set for a short film directed and written by my brother in law, Davor Krvavac. In his words;  “The Hit” explores the universal capacity of survivors and perpetrators of extreme violence to accommodate their experience; to return to mundane, ordinary life, despite carrying the knowledge of what for most would be unimaginable horror.

I feel slightly perturbed by the fact that my flat is the perfect home for his character. Should I be concerned with the fact that my now highly unfurnished flat can be turned into a desolate and bleak home for someone who has committed, what to me is unimaginable? Perhaps I'm being oversensitive? 

So, people start arriving, introductions are made. I'm swiftly introduced as Su, the art director... oh and I live here. Smile. I'm not sure how to deal with the responsibility of this title... what exactly is expected of me? I was overwhelmed by all the people, how quickly things were made to happen and the efficiency of these highly skilled and talented people. I was in way over my head and felt incredibly awkward at first. Especially as Liam the Ist A.D. was demanding and made me quiver. Every time I heard my name being called sharply I was reminded of how my mother would call me when I was in trouble as a child. I quickly realised that this was just his manner... and I could also see how efficient this made him. We did not have much time and he made things happen. So much so that the shoot was projected to finish at 4am and the flat had been rearranged and vacated by 2.30.

Now that I have recovered somewhat from the weekend's events, I now feel like I have been part of something really cool. I wish that I could have been more involved, but one really can't compain. I think I would have enjoyed being the costume department too. How amazing would it be to get invovled with more shoots? Sod it to be a runner though... I think I made more than my fair share of tea and coffee, not to mention the clearing up during and after... Just imagine 15 people in a small two bedroom flat... now think about 14 men all using the same toilet over a 16 hour period. Nice.

My role on the shoot was minimal, exluding the provision of the set of course, but I must say, the opportunity to watch these people work was incredible. The skills that they possess, made me feel inadequate, I had no idea what they were talking about half the time, the only conversation I could follow was about football between scenes! Just about. It was however an opportunity to meet new people, creative people, there were many question as to what I do, about my art work and my flat.

When I was dressing the stairs for filming, one of the directors asked if there was a way we could suggest an air of violence... A print that my sister and I worked on in the summer was ripped and attached to the wall in an askew manner to suggest that some force had been used. How exciting is that? Our artwork has actually made it into the film!  

Primrose Hill

A few weeks ago, I ended up meeting a friend who lives locally at 3.30 am for a midnight stroll. I was up as I had been out with friends and knew that there was no way I would be falling asleep anytime soon so when I received a message saying that said friend would be going for a walk, I jumped at the opportunity.

I was intrigued as to why he wanted to go for a walk at 3 in the morning... what was keeping him awake? Weirdo! To some extent I even felt that this was my quirky thing and that he was stealing my thunder... obviously, I'm aware that if I enjoy midnight strolls through the city I'm also probably not the only one. 

I've organised walks in dark woods for people who have never done so to experience nightfall in unfamiliar situations, but I'd never been for a walk with someone who actually enjoyed walking at night. So I set off on an adventure towards Primrose Hill, unsure how the experience of walking with company differes to walking on one's lonesome... 

... the conclusion....
The walk itself lasted several hours and I swiftly fell asleep around 7am once safely indoors, so the walk was successful in that respect. However, I realised how little one pays attention to one's surroundings when accompanied on a walk. I was walking without really thinking where I was going. I wasn't paying attention to all the details, the architecture, the sounds, flora or fauna. Was I safe? Was there someone behind me? Safety in numbers, didn't allow for feelings of discomfort often associated with night time strolls. There was no fear of the unknown in this situation. I knew where I was going, who I was going with and that I was safe knowing that I had company. There was no room for Burke's theory of subliminal fears triggured by darkness and the inability to see one's surroundings. 


In the few weeks since, I have found myself repeatedly thinking about Primrose hill at night... so much so that I decided I would have to return on my own. Which I did. Yesterday evening. With a tripod, sketchbook and materials. Its clearly been a while since I did this as I wasn't wearing enough layers. Consequently, I took some photographs that I'm rather pleased with but gave up after one drawing of the cityscape... My toes were numb and my hands felt like blocks of ice despite the fact that I was wearing gloves. 

That, and there were too many people around.
How is one supposed to think about feelings of discomfort and night time when there are runners huffing and puffing left right and center? I feel that another trip is needed, this time in the early hours of the morning to avoid congestion on the paths.