Tuesday, 29 November 2011
Monday, 15 August 2011
Photo Taking Extraveganza 2
Here are the photos I selected for last month's Photo Taking Extraveganza....
Bloom
Home
Blue
Wood
Urban
In Bloom 2
Movement
Contradiction
Self
Black
Water
Love
Sunday, 3 July 2011
Photo Taking Extravaganza!
One of my friends has started up a group on facebook, where we upload a photo for each theme at the end of the month. The most popular photographer then pics the themes for next month's photos and so forth. This has really excited me as I've basically been highly unproductive since the last burst of enthusiasm. I've decided to use the hipstamatic app on my phone instead of carrying around my big camera. Perhaps next month I can try that instead.
The themes are as follows:
Tuesday, 12 April 2011
Busy Bee
As promised, I went home on monday night to do some drawing for a screenprint. The image I was using has been taken by my sister on one of her projects in London that has involved walking. (The photo is below.) When I saw the picture I asked if I could use it for my work... She has agreed. I think a copy of the finished piece will be sufficient payment for use of her photo ejejeje I have worked out the layers and the colours for the print, all that is left now is to enlarge these drawings, but I haven't yet worked out what size the piece will be. Then I must make the positves. Only then will I be ready to go to the studio. Rather a long process.
I have to say, I got really wrapped up in what I was doing. I had forgotten how much I enjoy making my work. I felt a happiness that only comes from making my work. It's a similar feeling I get when I've been baking. It's a sort of satisfaction that I think ensures my survival. Dramatic I know, I don't expect everyone to empathise nor understand what I am trying to say. Basically, everything else in my life can be going really well. But when I'm making my artwork there is a sense of euphoria, a calmness and completeness.
And no I'm not crazy.
I'm an artist.
Where was I... oh yes. I got so wrapped up in the drawing, that once I'd finished those initial drawings I was hooked. I got the sketchbook that I took to Italy in 2009 as I've been waiting to make some work from those drawings since I got back! I took one drawing, which is of a thunderstorm over the lagoon in Venice. Even at the time I envisaged some sort of Lino cut. Whilst I tried to work out which areas I would need to cut from the lino, I got rather confused! Couldn't work out what would be black and what would be white once I'd used the paint. This through me into a bit of a panic. Shit I thought, I've left it too long without making work. This is never going to work! Thank God for Photoshop! There's something I would never think I'd say. I simply hate using photoshop, thought it is rather useful. Having scanned in my drawing of the parts I would be cutting out, I inverted the colours and as if by magic I saw what the finished product would look like. I rather liked what it might look like too! All was right with the world yet again.
Alas, twas time for bed but having been woken up at ridiculous o'clock the following day by the sun, I jumped out of bed at 8am. I felt inspired. Again. I decided to make good use of this as it doesn't happen very often. I went for a run. Didn't die. I was then bursting with entusiasim when I got home. So I cut out my lino and proceeded to make 10 editions of the print in my kitchen. I was rather pleased with myself when I arrived at work at mid day and told anyone who would listen how productive a morning I'd had!
It didn't finish there... renewed energy and enthusiasim led me to prepare the next lino, again, a drawing in Venice, looking across the lagoon at another, smaller island. At night of course. This was more intricate than the first. I was nervous as I've never been good at cutting lino intricately but I was patient and took my time. I was dubious as to whether it would work. Although it was gone 11pm and I was exhausted. I needed to know. There was no way I would ever be able to fall asleep without knowing. So I printed a few editions. Guess what... it worked and I rather like it! I have so much work to do now!
I was in bed, half asleep with the light on when my flatmate knocked on the door. He wanted to know what I'd been working on... he told me he loved it. He asked if it was Turkey. I told him it was venice. I couldn't have asked for a better way to end the day.
I have to say, I got really wrapped up in what I was doing. I had forgotten how much I enjoy making my work. I felt a happiness that only comes from making my work. It's a similar feeling I get when I've been baking. It's a sort of satisfaction that I think ensures my survival. Dramatic I know, I don't expect everyone to empathise nor understand what I am trying to say. Basically, everything else in my life can be going really well. But when I'm making my artwork there is a sense of euphoria, a calmness and completeness.
And no I'm not crazy.
I'm an artist.
Where was I... oh yes. I got so wrapped up in the drawing, that once I'd finished those initial drawings I was hooked. I got the sketchbook that I took to Italy in 2009 as I've been waiting to make some work from those drawings since I got back! I took one drawing, which is of a thunderstorm over the lagoon in Venice. Even at the time I envisaged some sort of Lino cut. Whilst I tried to work out which areas I would need to cut from the lino, I got rather confused! Couldn't work out what would be black and what would be white once I'd used the paint. This through me into a bit of a panic. Shit I thought, I've left it too long without making work. This is never going to work! Thank God for Photoshop! There's something I would never think I'd say. I simply hate using photoshop, thought it is rather useful. Having scanned in my drawing of the parts I would be cutting out, I inverted the colours and as if by magic I saw what the finished product would look like. I rather liked what it might look like too! All was right with the world yet again.
Alas, twas time for bed but having been woken up at ridiculous o'clock the following day by the sun, I jumped out of bed at 8am. I felt inspired. Again. I decided to make good use of this as it doesn't happen very often. I went for a run. Didn't die. I was then bursting with entusiasim when I got home. So I cut out my lino and proceeded to make 10 editions of the print in my kitchen. I was rather pleased with myself when I arrived at work at mid day and told anyone who would listen how productive a morning I'd had!
It didn't finish there... renewed energy and enthusiasim led me to prepare the next lino, again, a drawing in Venice, looking across the lagoon at another, smaller island. At night of course. This was more intricate than the first. I was nervous as I've never been good at cutting lino intricately but I was patient and took my time. I was dubious as to whether it would work. Although it was gone 11pm and I was exhausted. I needed to know. There was no way I would ever be able to fall asleep without knowing. So I printed a few editions. Guess what... it worked and I rather like it! I have so much work to do now!
I was in bed, half asleep with the light on when my flatmate knocked on the door. He wanted to know what I'd been working on... he told me he loved it. He asked if it was Turkey. I told him it was venice. I couldn't have asked for a better way to end the day.
Monday, 4 April 2011
I've got a feeling...
Today I woke up feeling inspired. I felt like going out for a jog the moment I awoke... I should have made use of the unusual motivation but alas, I rolled over and snoozed instead. This feeling of inspiration continued when I finally did get out of bed. Today I cleaned my bathroom... it is now very shiny. I tidied my room, cleaned the kitchen and threw some stuff out. I felt ever so slightly manically enthusiastic and happy.
Which makes a change.
I take this to be a good thing and hope that the feeling is going to stick around for a while. It would definitely be useful in terms of getting things done!
Once I had showered in my gleaming bathroom I was trying to decide what to do with the spare couple of hours till I met my mother for dinner. I felt oddly inclined to take photos. But I did not know what of or where. Which struck me as odd, as I am neither traveling nor was it night time, which is when you would usually find me with my camera in tow. I then decided that what I wanted, was a newspaper and cup of cwafeee.
I bought my newspaper and headed to the cwafeee shop, the whole time, unable to shake this feeling. The thing that has been so baffling to me, isn't that I've been feeling particularly inspired but the fact that I just feel inspired. I'm not inspired to to do a particular thing. I've just been walking around all day with this feeling. Not quite knowing how to put it to use. Though I have decided that tomorrow I shall be up at 8am (I am doing the 12pm shift) to start making the drawings for my next screen print, which is very exciting!
I was quite enjoying the cwafee and the newspaper and the occasional watching the world go by until I realised that this year, just hasn't been a good year for humanity. There has been so much human loss and suffering in the past 3 months, in addition to the already existing human suffering, that half into my newspaper I just felt broken hearted.
Reading the newspaper and watching the news breaks my heart and has been known to reduce me to tears. My sister says that I shouldn't bother doing either if it's just going to depress me, but that if I insist I need to make sure I don't get romantically embroiled.
I have never thought of myself as particularly political but in comparison to most of my peers it would appear that I am. I have been on anti war marches and demos but then so have many people. But this year's north African revolutions, the Arabian rioting and the hunger for political reform has moved me. I find the photo journalism astounding at the moment. To be so embroiled in those moments. Some of the moments captured are just amazing. Slightly crazy and incredibly brave. I have had a brainwave. I want to take photos like that too. I want to go to a country that is either war torn or currently in the middle of an uprising/political revolution. I want to be somewhere that the people are fighting for what they believe in. I want to document it and capture the effects of those desires.
I announced my desire at dinner to my mother and sister. Surprisingly, my mother did not beg me not to have such crazy ideas. My sister whom is ever supportive, told me to go for it.
Now to find the means and the balls to do so.
Would anyone like to finance me?
Wednesday, 16 March 2011
I am a Scaredy Cat!
I have recently come to the conclusion that I'm scared.
I'm going to say it again. My name is Susana Monteiro and I am a scaredy cat.
Though I admit I'm scared about many things, I refuse to accept that they are all irrational fears. Imagine my life as a ring binder full of organised (ish) paperwork, that, I having decided changes needed to be made, then proceeded to rip out all the paper. The end result has meant it's taken a little while to re-organise my life. I now live a relatively normal life. In fact, I've never had such a normal working life. No more late nights, no more 10 hour shifts. It's great.
Another big change is coming. The studio that I've been so looking forward to furnishing will soon have a flatmate in it instead. Though it pains me to give up my currently non existing studio, it is for the better. I will no longer be relying on family to help me pay the rent, which will be a great relief. It will also be quite nice to have a flatmate around. It is someone that I have known for a long time and we have quite different working routines, so we won't be in each others' faces all the time. The downside... no more walking out of my bedroom naked and I now have to share with a boy. I may have to train him to lower the toilet seat!
Now that I have come to the conclusion that said friend isn't my "boyfriend", I have stopped freaking out by his moving in with me. The worst thing that can happen? He doesn't pay the rent? I know his entire family and where they live. We don't live well together? I ask him to leave. But realistically, the likelihood of any of this happening is very small. We have already agreed the date of his moving in party. Bring on the summer.
This week I realised that I've been using the fact that I don't have somewhere to work as an excuse to not work. At the beginning of January I told myself that I would spend a few months getting back into arty things, start taking photos and working on the negatives to expose my screens with in April, which is when I can afford to go to the print studio for the first time in many months... I'm scared and don't know where to start. I feel like I've bought a new sketchbook and feel intimidated by it's brilliantly white pages that are just waiting to be filled with creative ideas and images.
How does one restart a creative process after an involuntary break of six months? The ideas and thoughts have been flowing freely for some time now need to be turned into actions, processes, and though I have started walking again I haven't produced any concrete ideas for prints.
I have also realised that everyday I procrastinate and think to myself "tomorrow"... Tomorrow always seems to turn into weeks. Surely weeks turn into months and months into years. Is this how people loose sight of their dreams? Can one get so scared that instead of doing what we really want to do, we wrap ourselves up with the rest of our lives and put off the things that we really want to do for another day until we've forgotten what it was that we wanted to do in the first place? Is that how it happens? Is that where the bitterness comes from? Because 1, 5, 10 or even 20 years down the line you wake up and realise what it was that you really wanted to do and that you wish you'd had the courage to do so?
Is it really so easy to let things slip? I'm not sure what I'm most scared of right now... the fact that I feel so unsure of myself as an artist to get on with the work or loosing sight of the dream. That burning desire to make that keeps me awake at night. I don't want to let down the six year old that said she wanted to be an artist when all the other girls said they wanted to be teachers, nurses or lawyers. I don't want to be one of those people that hates their life and feels like they've wasted it away.
So I guess the only thing to do is to pull myself together.
I will not be one of those people. I think therefore I am. I think, therefore I am an artist.
At least I will feel like one when I finally get round to my first day at the print studio. What's the best way to kick yourself up the arse? Book two sessions (after payday of course) at the studio. Lets put a deadline to producing some work. Because surely if I don't push myself no one else will!
My name is Susana Monteiro. I am an artist and yes, I am scared.
Tuesday, 15 March 2011
Monday, 21 February 2011
"The Hit."
It's sunday night and I'm absolutely exhausted!
By 11am on saturday my house had become over run with many a film person and so much equipment that it was being put on the balcony. There just was no room for 15 crew members, lighting equipment, cameras, lenses, my hamster and all the rest of my belongings.
My flat was the perfect set for a short film directed and written by my brother in law, Davor Krvavac. In his words; “The Hit” explores the universal capacity of survivors and perpetrators of extreme violence to accommodate their experience; to return to mundane, ordinary life, despite carrying the knowledge of what for most would be unimaginable horror.
I feel slightly perturbed by the fact that my flat is the perfect home for his character. Should I be concerned with the fact that my now highly unfurnished flat can be turned into a desolate and bleak home for someone who has committed, what to me is unimaginable? Perhaps I'm being oversensitive?
So, people start arriving, introductions are made. I'm swiftly introduced as Su, the art director... oh and I live here. Smile. I'm not sure how to deal with the responsibility of this title... what exactly is expected of me? I was overwhelmed by all the people, how quickly things were made to happen and the efficiency of these highly skilled and talented people. I was in way over my head and felt incredibly awkward at first. Especially as Liam the Ist A.D. was demanding and made me quiver. Every time I heard my name being called sharply I was reminded of how my mother would call me when I was in trouble as a child. I quickly realised that this was just his manner... and I could also see how efficient this made him. We did not have much time and he made things happen. So much so that the shoot was projected to finish at 4am and the flat had been rearranged and vacated by 2.30.
Now that I have recovered somewhat from the weekend's events, I now feel like I have been part of something really cool. I wish that I could have been more involved, but one really can't compain. I think I would have enjoyed being the costume department too. How amazing would it be to get invovled with more shoots? Sod it to be a runner though... I think I made more than my fair share of tea and coffee, not to mention the clearing up during and after... Just imagine 15 people in a small two bedroom flat... now think about 14 men all using the same toilet over a 16 hour period. Nice.
My role on the shoot was minimal, exluding the provision of the set of course, but I must say, the opportunity to watch these people work was incredible. The skills that they possess, made me feel inadequate, I had no idea what they were talking about half the time, the only conversation I could follow was about football between scenes! Just about. It was however an opportunity to meet new people, creative people, there were many question as to what I do, about my art work and my flat.
When I was dressing the stairs for filming, one of the directors asked if there was a way we could suggest an air of violence... A print that my sister and I worked on in the summer was ripped and attached to the wall in an askew manner to suggest that some force had been used. How exciting is that? Our artwork has actually made it into the film!
Now that I have recovered somewhat from the weekend's events, I now feel like I have been part of something really cool. I wish that I could have been more involved, but one really can't compain. I think I would have enjoyed being the costume department too. How amazing would it be to get invovled with more shoots? Sod it to be a runner though... I think I made more than my fair share of tea and coffee, not to mention the clearing up during and after... Just imagine 15 people in a small two bedroom flat... now think about 14 men all using the same toilet over a 16 hour period. Nice.
My role on the shoot was minimal, exluding the provision of the set of course, but I must say, the opportunity to watch these people work was incredible. The skills that they possess, made me feel inadequate, I had no idea what they were talking about half the time, the only conversation I could follow was about football between scenes! Just about. It was however an opportunity to meet new people, creative people, there were many question as to what I do, about my art work and my flat.
When I was dressing the stairs for filming, one of the directors asked if there was a way we could suggest an air of violence... A print that my sister and I worked on in the summer was ripped and attached to the wall in an askew manner to suggest that some force had been used. How exciting is that? Our artwork has actually made it into the film!
Thursday, 17 February 2011
Primrose Hill
A few weeks ago, I ended up meeting a friend who lives locally at 3.30 am for a midnight stroll. I was up as I had been out with friends and knew that there was no way I would be falling asleep anytime soon so when I received a message saying that said friend would be going for a walk, I jumped at the opportunity.
I was intrigued as to why he wanted to go for a walk at 3 in the morning... what was keeping him awake? Weirdo! To some extent I even felt that this was my quirky thing and that he was stealing my thunder... obviously, I'm aware that if I enjoy midnight strolls through the city I'm also probably not the only one.
I've organised walks in dark woods for people who have never done so to experience nightfall in unfamiliar situations, but I'd never been for a walk with someone who actually enjoyed walking at night. So I set off on an adventure towards Primrose Hill, unsure how the experience of walking with company differes to walking on one's lonesome...
... the conclusion....
The walk itself lasted several hours and I swiftly fell asleep around 7am once safely indoors, so the walk was successful in that respect. However, I realised how little one pays attention to one's surroundings when accompanied on a walk. I was walking without really thinking where I was going. I wasn't paying attention to all the details, the architecture, the sounds, flora or fauna. Was I safe? Was there someone behind me? Safety in numbers, didn't allow for feelings of discomfort often associated with night time strolls. There was no fear of the unknown in this situation. I knew where I was going, who I was going with and that I was safe knowing that I had company. There was no room for Burke's theory of subliminal fears triggured by darkness and the inability to see one's surroundings.
In the few weeks since, I have found myself repeatedly thinking about Primrose hill at night... so much so that I decided I would have to return on my own. Which I did. Yesterday evening. With a tripod, sketchbook and materials. Its clearly been a while since I did this as I wasn't wearing enough layers. Consequently, I took some photographs that I'm rather pleased with but gave up after one drawing of the cityscape... My toes were numb and my hands felt like blocks of ice despite the fact that I was wearing gloves.
That, and there were too many people around.
How is one supposed to think about feelings of discomfort and night time when there are runners huffing and puffing left right and center? I feel that another trip is needed, this time in the early hours of the morning to avoid congestion on the paths.
I was intrigued as to why he wanted to go for a walk at 3 in the morning... what was keeping him awake? Weirdo! To some extent I even felt that this was my quirky thing and that he was stealing my thunder... obviously, I'm aware that if I enjoy midnight strolls through the city I'm also probably not the only one.
I've organised walks in dark woods for people who have never done so to experience nightfall in unfamiliar situations, but I'd never been for a walk with someone who actually enjoyed walking at night. So I set off on an adventure towards Primrose Hill, unsure how the experience of walking with company differes to walking on one's lonesome...
... the conclusion....
The walk itself lasted several hours and I swiftly fell asleep around 7am once safely indoors, so the walk was successful in that respect. However, I realised how little one pays attention to one's surroundings when accompanied on a walk. I was walking without really thinking where I was going. I wasn't paying attention to all the details, the architecture, the sounds, flora or fauna. Was I safe? Was there someone behind me? Safety in numbers, didn't allow for feelings of discomfort often associated with night time strolls. There was no fear of the unknown in this situation. I knew where I was going, who I was going with and that I was safe knowing that I had company. There was no room for Burke's theory of subliminal fears triggured by darkness and the inability to see one's surroundings.
In the few weeks since, I have found myself repeatedly thinking about Primrose hill at night... so much so that I decided I would have to return on my own. Which I did. Yesterday evening. With a tripod, sketchbook and materials. Its clearly been a while since I did this as I wasn't wearing enough layers. Consequently, I took some photographs that I'm rather pleased with but gave up after one drawing of the cityscape... My toes were numb and my hands felt like blocks of ice despite the fact that I was wearing gloves.
That, and there were too many people around.
How is one supposed to think about feelings of discomfort and night time when there are runners huffing and puffing left right and center? I feel that another trip is needed, this time in the early hours of the morning to avoid congestion on the paths.
Sunday, 23 January 2011
The end of an era.
The last six months have passed in bit of blur...2011 has had a decidedly unstable start but this week marks the end of an era and the beginning of another. Two weeks ago I quit my job... I do now have another... what a shame that I'm yet to win the lottery and just be an artist all the time. At the new job, I will be working a mere 38 hours a week, as a pose to the 50 I have grown accustomed to. I will now have my evenings and my weekends off. Add this to the fact that I now find myself living on my own and I have lots of time to fill with creative activities that I've been longing to do for such a long time.
So what next... I want to do everything... I'm unsure how best to start this new life. I feel that things need to be done one step at a time as I'm concerned that the immense change that my life is seeing all at once may just become a tad overwhelming soon. So next month I plan to set up my studio space, this means a trip to ikea! which will provide me with a desk, a chair, a book case and drawers to put all my materials.
T'is tres exciting.
Next, set myself a brief? or should I just make it up as I go? working on different things depending on my mood? I'm inclined to write a brief or two as there are two projects that I want to make work towards. That way I can alternate between themes and ideas.
Something which I find interesting since I lost my marbles a few months ago is that I no longer feel that I must do a masters in order to survive. I would still love to do a masters, but it has suddenly become less important. I feel that actually it would be more beneficial to set up a practice (which doesn't currently exist!) and perhaps analyze whether a masters is really what I want to do in a year or so. Making work is the priority... and maybe trying to exhibit... seeing art work... and talking about it! I miss talking about art and knowing everything about the current art world. Its time to start reading all the periodicals that I have subscribed to and paid for!
What say you on the matter?
P.S. All previous posts have been copied and pasted from a previous blog. This is the latest post
June 2010
A year on from my own degree show!
Last night i returned to my university for this years degree show. I year on since my own degree show, i made my way home feeling confused and disappointed. I mean no disrespect to any of the students participating but i left thinking that i didnt like a lot of the work.
There was a lot of painting, which i felt was of a good quality, as was the photography and the printing. The more conceptual work i seemed to struggle with. I found it difficult to appreciate and admire.
But instead of this meaning that the work isn't very good, i'm now thinking that it has nothing to do with the quality of the work but comes from my own lack of understanding and my mental block when it comes to conceptual and sculptural work.
I find it very hard to appreciate sculptural and conceptual work. I just dont get it. i know it sounds ignorant but i really struggle. With the more conceptual work, if i know the history, the thought process, where it has come from then i will be able to relate or empathise better which in turn means that my appreciation is much better.
But at the degree show, i didnt have the opportunity to read about the work like i would have liked to nor to talk to the artists. The ones that i did manage to, i got a much better understanding.
So I've reached the conclusion that its me not you. Its my mental block the prevents me from being able to enjoy more of the work on show.
But it also worries me. I dont think that my work is particularly conceptual. Perhaps some people might thing it is, i see it as an obsession with night and darkness. How many people at my own degree show went away feeling the same way i did last night? what if the people that see my work at the the exhibition in august, leave feeling the same way that i left feeling yesterday?
i dont want people to come along to my private view and think, wow that was really crap! So surely, hard work and effort will prevent this from happening? does one need anymore motivation than that?
June 2010
In January I set myself a year long project that i would be able to complete alongside my full time job. The idea, to keep me making artwork and gain some exhibiting experience. I'm interested in the theories of the sublime and the uncanny, I'm slightly obsessed with darkness, mainly through an irrational fear of the dark. Though I'm scared of the dark, i have always been compelled to walk at night, through the city, the countryside, abroad and in the woods. I find it theraputic, inspiring and terrifying.
I approached a friend from my degree to see if he would be interested in exhibiting together as our work stems from an interest in the same theories and thoughts but has completely different outcomes. This is not a collaboration. I just thought it would be nice to do this together for experience as it appeared we had each set ourselves a project.
I'm a printer, but a lot of my prints are developed from drawings on walks and long exposure photographs, i wanted to split the project over the year with a summer exhibition of the photographs and the prints at the end of the year. I feel that its time to give my photographs some credit, i dont think they're half bad. i dont see myself as a photographer but I'm not an amatur. Maybe i am, who knows.
The photographs are taken in west london in an inspiring urban environmental that i've always loved. There are elements to the area that remind me of 'blade runner' and 'rear window'.
I'm really pleased with the way the photos are coming along, i'm starting to see groups that could be placed together for the exhibition. I'm starting to identify themes and i now want to take more photos with this in mind.
But as time passes i'm starting to take heed of the gallerist, perhaps the photos on their own won't suffice? How will they look next to the other artist's work which at the moment looks like it will comprised of large paintings/collage/screen-prints? Part of me thinks that the stark difference in the aesthetics of the work could really work. but what if the work is too different? My digital cityscape photographs and his handmade rural paintings/collage/screenprints? match in heaven or a disaster waiting to happen?
I have started planning out prints that i want to make. At the gallerist's suggestion, i had thought to display both photos and prints together. she even suggested some sort of projection or animation but i dont know where that suggestion came from. in some ways my photos and prints could tie our work together quite nicely, but then i'm not sure that the photos would work next to the prints... and so the doubt continues.
But as i take more photos and start looking at which ones look good together in diptics and triptics, i get excited. Is that because they actually are good? Can a actually make this work? I think the rebel is coming out in me and though i have doubts, for the first time since I got the exhibition space, i'm starting to feel like i'll be able to say, that i presented my proposal, photos that I'd already taken and you (the gallerist) agreed and this is how i want things to pan out.
And i want to be true to my original idea. It won't be the end of the world if our work doesnt look good together, we'll learn from the experience and move on.
But i want it to work. I'm proud of my photos and think they can stand on their own two legs, but will the audiance agree? what if i'm actually dilisusional and the photos really are just average photos, afterall "anyone can take photos at night". But the point is, most never do. How many people walk around at night? How many people hear the birds singing at night? How many people feel safe outside at night? Are they any safer behind the closed windows with the lights on? Personally, I always sleep better after a midnight walk.
I approached a friend from my degree to see if he would be interested in exhibiting together as our work stems from an interest in the same theories and thoughts but has completely different outcomes. This is not a collaboration. I just thought it would be nice to do this together for experience as it appeared we had each set ourselves a project.
I'm a printer, but a lot of my prints are developed from drawings on walks and long exposure photographs, i wanted to split the project over the year with a summer exhibition of the photographs and the prints at the end of the year. I feel that its time to give my photographs some credit, i dont think they're half bad. i dont see myself as a photographer but I'm not an amatur. Maybe i am, who knows.
The photographs are taken in west london in an inspiring urban environmental that i've always loved. There are elements to the area that remind me of 'blade runner' and 'rear window'.
I'm really pleased with the way the photos are coming along, i'm starting to see groups that could be placed together for the exhibition. I'm starting to identify themes and i now want to take more photos with this in mind.
But as time passes i'm starting to take heed of the gallerist, perhaps the photos on their own won't suffice? How will they look next to the other artist's work which at the moment looks like it will comprised of large paintings/collage/screen-prints? Part of me thinks that the stark difference in the aesthetics of the work could really work. but what if the work is too different? My digital cityscape photographs and his handmade rural paintings/collage/screenprints? match in heaven or a disaster waiting to happen?
I have started planning out prints that i want to make. At the gallerist's suggestion, i had thought to display both photos and prints together. she even suggested some sort of projection or animation but i dont know where that suggestion came from. in some ways my photos and prints could tie our work together quite nicely, but then i'm not sure that the photos would work next to the prints... and so the doubt continues.
But as i take more photos and start looking at which ones look good together in diptics and triptics, i get excited. Is that because they actually are good? Can a actually make this work? I think the rebel is coming out in me and though i have doubts, for the first time since I got the exhibition space, i'm starting to feel like i'll be able to say, that i presented my proposal, photos that I'd already taken and you (the gallerist) agreed and this is how i want things to pan out.
And i want to be true to my original idea. It won't be the end of the world if our work doesnt look good together, we'll learn from the experience and move on.
But i want it to work. I'm proud of my photos and think they can stand on their own two legs, but will the audiance agree? what if i'm actually dilisusional and the photos really are just average photos, afterall "anyone can take photos at night". But the point is, most never do. How many people walk around at night? How many people hear the birds singing at night? How many people feel safe outside at night? Are they any safer behind the closed windows with the lights on? Personally, I always sleep better after a midnight walk.
May 2010
I am a Professional Artist!
Today I went along to the artists forum in Bethanal Green. In the space of 2 hours I took in a lot of information, was told to sell myself as a professional artist and decided to start up this blog, of which I can only hope that this is the first of many posts.
I'm unsure of how blogging artistically will work for me, I imagine it will be a bit like my journal. I think I'll approach it as an outlet for my thoughts, ideas and experiances. Does that make it my diary?
A year on from graduation, I find myself working full time in the catering industry, unable to decrease my hours as i attempt to make enough money for all the bills. I struggle to keep face as I attempt to make artwork alongside a 45 hour week whilst organising an exhibition in the summer.
But its ok because I'm happy in the knowledge that i'm working towards the sort of lifestyle that i've wanted since i can remember. Things are happening slowly, but they're happening. I know that one day, maybe sooner than i think, i will be able to dedicate myself to my passion.
So join me and help me as i embark on this journey to assert myself as a professional artist.
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